…and they shall become one flesh(Genesis 2:24 – ESV)
Have you ever wondered why men and women who work together in a movie fall in love so often? Or why people who work together at the job fall for each other so often? Or why when you start helping a friend out, working together to solve a problem, and you do it together and it works out good, then you want to fall for them? Well think about it. What is the same in all these scenarios? The people work together toward a common solution, and doing this has bonded them together for a common cause. Both are in unison and harmony about it. They both have different talents but they combine them, they work together to achieve something.
Think hard now about the words “work together” and their meaning. Work together, work together, working or coming together. See? Not just working side by side but working into togetherness, into a unit. You share a significant event in your life together. You overcome something by being together, and that is what good marriages are made of and good relationships are made of. It is no wonder if people aren’t processing things well, or they aren’t in a relationship, or the current one is not going well, for them to want to come together with that person they have already bonded with successfully. What do you expect?
People should be able to work together without working themselves together. We must mature to the point that the trouble with togetherness doesn’t enter into our lives, else we cannot partner and accomplish things we might be able to do otherwise. We must remain closely knit to our spouses as one flesh so that people can work with us together, but no one else can work their way together with us. If your relationship has depth you won’t drown in these shallow waters.
10 comments:
Just spent the weekend at a marriage seminar and left so frustrated at the world for it's views on marriage. I am so blessed to be in a committed covenant with my husband. We are watching family and friends giving up all around us as they look to satisfy their hunger to please their own flesh.
Great post!
Another very interesting take. I'm beginning to think you've made a habit of doing that. ;-) Thanks, it was fresh.
Hi, JD. I like this post..very wise. Being aware of the snare is half the battle. Avoiding the pitfall and fleeing temptation is the other half. Then victory. Love and prayers, Mom
It is also important to have your priorities straight, and to be preoccupied with the things of the Spirit, and not with the things of the flesh.
And - if you have marital problems, looking for a solution outside your marriage is not going to solve them, right? When a pipe breaks in your house, you do not run to a neighbor to try his pipes, but you fix your own.
Or the very wise saying: the grass is not greener on the other side - it is only watered more often... (I think I picked this one up from Steve Camp).
Important post, JD. Thank You.
Yeah, we really need to be on the lookout, not cynically, but sensitively...overconfidence kills...
I can picture the late Aussie Steve Irwin here, saying "Danga, (danger) danga, danga!" He got close to the danger, and was better at handling all kinds of things with poison, sharp teeth, and stingers, but in the end, his proximity to danger cost him his life. And when it happened, he wasn't flirting with disaster, but a great tragedy occurred nonetheless.
I do not say that men and women cannot work together, but we must be very, very careful. Danga, danga, danga!
This IS a very wise post. Being in a male-dominated field, enjoying male-dominated pursuits all my life, I have come to be very aware of those "pitfalls" when it comes to working closely toward a solution with members of the opposite gender.
And I like how you used the word "maturity" often. It really struck me, because it's something I've been wrestling with in my own life. Maturity is very important here, as God gives wisdom, and by clinging to God I have come to know that it is for His glory that I am still single, and not for my own frustration. If it were not for sin in the world, I would have an easier time leaning on God as my husband right now. Praise Him for His grace and mercy!!!
This was just a good overall post.
Even men with men and women with women need to be careful, not that heterosexual types are in danger in that way, but that they don't start giving too much of their lives to their friends instead of their wife or husband...I am being serious when I say that I rarely, if ever, see these issues addressed...
Great post JD...much needed and seldom addressed - especially that last comment you made. I know that one personally.
Bless you!
Lynda R
It is great to see you in cyberspace, Lynda, blessings to you as well...
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